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Saturday, December 29

Greetings. My name is Samuel Todd. I live in a suburb of a fairly big northwestern city. I am the guy who delivers your papers early in the wee hours of the morning and I gotta say…you see some pretty hairy shit in the middle of the night when all the “normal” folks are in bed.

I’ve been a fan of the internet since Q-Link, that may give away my age but that’s cool. So, I finally decided to start a blog. With some of the stuff I’ve seen, hell…I thought about writing a book, but I don’t have the-

What is it that writers have?

(Besides talent smarty pants)

Determination.

Drive.

Stick-to-it-iveness.

Yep. That’s it.

Instead, I’ve decided to just ramble on and share my odd adventures and observations. A few things about me. I’m single. Well, actually, I’m divorced. Twice. I have a daughter from marriage number two. Elizabeth Marie. She goes by Beth, has since she was seven. She’s an insane fourteen this most recent December 13th. Every year for her birthday, I get the guys in our little band “The Stupid Muses” together, we put the phone on speaker and I sing that KISS song, Beth. It’s cheesy, but I still get away with it due to it being tradition. Of course the first three years I did it in our garage. Mine and Erin’s (Erin is Elizabeth’s mom). My daughter would sit on the washing machine with her little hands clasped under her chin and just beam. Her curly dark brown hair framed her perfectly oval face and those hazel eyes actually sparkles.

I’m drifting off the deep end; aren’t I? Sorry, but when it comes to daddy’s little girl, I get a bit misty.

So, besides delivering the newspaper, I play guitar and sing in a small-time band. Mostly we do parties, reunions and stuff. It doesn’t pay much but I make enough to get by and still keep up on my child support. Erin never trips if I’m late. She knows I’m good for it. She and I still get along okay and when it comes to Elizabeth, our little Beth, differences are set aside. It ain’t our daughter’s fault that her parents couldn’t spend longer than an hour together without verbally shredding each other.

Anyways, it’s getting late so I gotta get to the center and get my load of papers. I picked today to start because the craziest shit is on New Year’s and Full Moons. Check with me tomorrow and hopefully I’ll have something juicy.